


images of you

by fromthefarshore



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: I don't know where this fic was going, M/M, does it even have any point
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-14
Updated: 2015-01-14
Packaged: 2018-03-07 13:49:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,199
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3175314
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fromthefarshore/pseuds/fromthefarshore
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kenma can't get his mind off the fact how people create images of others in their heads.</p>
            </blockquote>





	images of you

When all those years ago Kenma's mom had said that Kuroo is a strange kid who's interested only in volleyball, Kenma just shrugged his shoulders, too tired to try proving a point that no, that's not how Kuroo is. He's nice, and kind, sometimes a bit sly and funny, but not simply strange; he likes volleyball, but there's a side of Kuroo when he sits next to Kenma, looking at his new game, commenting his every move, his volleyball forgotten somewhere on the ground. He also likes stupid shows on TV, and even reading, but the last time he told his mom that they're going to bookstore, she chuckled silently, telling him that there's no need to hide the truth.

She wouldn't understand, she wouldn't accept it because there's already a strong image of Kuroo graved into her head and it's easiest to leave it like this.

-

All these years later and in his mother's eyes Kuroo is still labelled under category of strange. Not in a bad way, never so, but it's always the same and not entirely correct and it makes Kenma let out a deep sigh, telling her that _he's not_ , but she'd just smile, saying that it's fine, she accepts him.

-

She also thinks that Kenma is her little son even though he's in a high school, but Kenma has given up of trying to erase this image from her head. It has some advantages, though, she never asks him about girls he's interested in, because the image of her little son is without any girls around, only with Kuroo and Kuroo only. And it makes Kenma smile slightly as sometimes the world is so ironic.

-

"It's strange," Kenma sighs, rolling on his side, a few strands of hair getting across his eyes. Kuroo puts away sports magazine and crosses his legs into more comfortable position, leaning forward.

"What is?" he asks, a playful smirk on his face, then moves his hand to brush the hair from Kenma's face, his touch lingering there a bit longer.

They're in Kuroo's room, Kenma laying on his bed, facing the wall Kuroo was leaned against, his legs bent slightly over Kenma to not weight him too much. And at this moment in Kenma's eyes Kuroo's everything but strange.

"How people create you inside their heads," Kenma looks up from his game, his eyes focused on Kuroo's fingers that freeze for a moment and then move away from his face. Kuroo thinks for a second, then hums to himself, shrugging.

"People are strange in general," he smiles, his hand reaching for the magazine again. And that's the Kuroo he knows, the one that fits the image in Kenma's head perfectly well. A little smile on his face when he doesn't feel confident, trying to be nice, even though he doesn't like what's happening and after a while ends up biting the inside of his cheek. Not the cool guy how all the girls from school imagine him, not the intimidating one how some volleyball players see him, but the simple boy, that tries to get away from things he doesn't like.

"You're running away," Kenma withholds his smile and closes his eyes for a bit longer time than necessary for blinking, then gets back to his game. After a few moments he casts another glance to Kuroo, who ignores his remark, pretending to be interested in a random article about new shoes for football.

-

Kuroo knows that he _is_ running away, but sometimes running away is better than trying to get how things work and why everything is as it is. Kuroo thinks that some things are best left unexplained, but Kenma, the same Kenma who seems to be so indifferent, gets interested more often than not; and Kuroo knows that he's going to bring this up again, but at least now he has some time to prepare.

It's only natural that people create their own version of you in their heads, and Kuroo thinks it's not that strange, it just happens, but Kenma always needs to know more.

-

One part of Kenma in Kuroo's head is like a five-year-old that is complemented with questions why, why, why. The only difference is that usually Kenma doesn't voice his questions out. He lets Kuroo know what he's thinking about, but he never asks the actual question _why_ , instead trying to find the answers himself.

He's doing the same again, his cattish eyes boring holes into Kuroo's skull.

"If you had to describe Bokuto," he says after a while, and Kuroo takes a deeper breath, not waiting Kenma to finish the sentence.

"Fun," he grins, knowing exactly where it's going. It's magical, really, how they know each other so well, as if their own minds switch to the other ones to understand what is going on. They talked about it before, Kuroo saying that it's a little miracle and Kenma insisting that it's just the result of being together and unconsciously analyzing each other.

"I'd say a bit weird," Kenma mutters, slightly furrowing his eyebrows. Kuroo stops briefly for Kenma to get into same line as him, then puts his arm around shorter boy's shoulders, pulling him closer when they walk down the street.

"You won't let me get away from this, huh?" he chuckles, nuzzling his nose against Kenma's hair.

"Stop it, Kuroo, it's embarrassing," Kenma shakes his head, but the corners of his mouth rise even though just a little bit. "I'm interested," he says, lowering his eyes, "I just don't really get it."

 _Why_ , Kuroo finishes in his head, but doesn't say anything. Kenma also stays silent, lost in his own world. Kuroo waits until they pass two crossings, then takes a deep breath.

"Doesn't it depend on how much you open up to people?" he mutters and Kenma lets out a short silent laugh.

"Maybe."

-

"Isn't he cute?" Kuroo hears one girl whispering to another when he comes to Kenma's classroom.

"Kozume?" the other girl snickers and Kuroo slows down, "I'd say he's a bit strange, but who knows. Try asking him out," she gently nudges her friend in the ribs and the girl blushes. They notice Kuroo and slightly bow their heads, getting out of the classroom, giggling.

Kenma is biting his lip, looking at his hands on the desk.

"Everything's alright?" Kuroo furrows his eyebrows, getting a chair and sitting at Kenma's desk.

"You heard them," Kenma mutters, his eyes moving to Kuroo. "I didn't do anything, I didn't even talk to them."

 _Then why_ , Kuroo can see it in Kenma's eyes, and he just shrugs.

"Maybe you remind them of someone."

"They just create the image in their heads. Like in a game," he sighs and crouches on his desk. "I don't want it," he adds after a moment. "She doesn't _know_ me, she doesn't like _me_."

"Why does it bother you so much?" Kuroo moves his hand to Kenma's head, his fingers interlacing with his hair strands. Kenma only gives him a look, staying silent as if he used all the talking resources for today. Kuroo smiles and leaves it at this.

"Should I make it a bit more obvious so she wouldn't do anything?" he says silently when the girls come back. Kenma bites his lip, looking at Kuroo's silvering eyes and thinking if he's ready for Kuroo's intentions. He lowers his eyes after a moment, then slowly moves his head in something resembling a nod. They way Kuroo's fingers are moving changes in a second, his fingers moving more lazily, seeming more intimate and Kenma doesn't know how he's doing it, but it catches the girls attention. Kuroo's lips turn into a smirk and he leans closer to Kenma, planting a kiss on the corner of his mouth.

The girls' eyes widen a bit and Kenma could pinpoint the exact moment when the images of both him and Kuroo in their heads have changed.

Kuroo messes up his hair and leaves, a wide smile playing on his lips.

It's the first time Kuroo has kissed him, and his mind gets new information to work with, but somehow the image of Kuroo in Kenma's head doesn't change at all. It just makes him feel warmer inside.

-

"Can you do it again?" Kenma asks when they're alone in the park, playing volleyball.

"Do what?"

"Give me a kiss," Kenma says in a small voice and Kuroo almost gets hit in the face, catching the ball the last second.

"Now? You sure?"

Kenma nods, lowering his head, "If you want to, that is."

Kuroo smiles, putting the volleyball on the ground and coming closer to Kenma, "I... Yeah, I want to."

Kenma lifts up his head and Kuroo leans down, locking their lips in a short kiss. When Kuroo pulls away, Kenma is looking into his dark eyes.

"Did anything change?"

Kuroo smiles. His heart beating became a bit faster and he's trembling slightly inside, and it's harder to stop himself from smiling when Kenma's cheeks are tainted with pink, but that's not what Kenma is asking, so he shakes his head and takes a deep breath, "You're still the same Kenma here and inside my head."

Kenma looks away, trying to figure something out, but then his eyes travel back to Kuroo.

"Why?" he asks and Kuroo's lips turn into a smirk. It's rare of Kenma to ask why, but here he is, standing in front of Kuroo like a kid incapable of understanding why grass is green. And this time, even though he doesn't like reasoning, somehow Kuroo comes up with an answer.

"I guess people create a specific you in their heads to show themselves that they have something great in their life or to kind of get an excuse why something doesn't work the way they want it to. Like Bokuto, right? He's fun to me because I like having him around and I want to show myself that I managed to get a great friend, but he's weird to you because you don't really understand the way he acts and you want to get a reason for that. And here it is, he's weird, so it's only natural you don't get him," Kuroo furrows his eyebrows, "Sorry, it sounded kind of bad."

"It's okay," Kenma smiles weakly, his hands finding their way into pockets, "Go on."

"And only later you start adding more characteristics to those images in your head. If you want to, of course. You're always updating the imagine until it gets as real as possible. And the more time you spend with people, the more you open up to them, the more real their image of you gets. So in my case," he stops and thinks for a moment, a wide smile making its way to his face, "Probably because you're already completed in my mind, so nothing really changed."

"You're the same in my head, too," Kenma says, biting the inside of his cheek, "I thought that... kiss would change it, but it seems I was wrong."

Kuroo laughs, "It was already included in the image, that's why. It was ought to happen sooner or later anyway," he shrugs and Kenma gets his hand from the pocket to punch him slightly. Kuroo laughs a bit louder, his hand getting into Kenma's hair. He messes them up a bit, but gradually his movements become gentle, more of a caress and in the end his fingers move to Kenma's nape, his laugh stopping.

"Hey, Kenma?"

"Yes?"

"Can you stop thinking about all these things?" Kuroo whispers, "They're not going to change anything."

Kenma licks his lips and takes a deeper breath when his eyes travel to Kuroo's lips on their own, "I can try."

"Good," Kuroo smiles, "Great. Now, close your eyes."

"It's embarrassing," Kenma mutters, but he still closes his eyes, his arms reaching for Kuroo's neck, knowing exactly where and how to move when they meet halfway for a kiss. It lasts longer, and it feels nicer and Kenma realises that Kuroo's been right. It was always included in the image of Kuroo and it feels just as good as he imagined.  

Because it's Kuroo, and in Kenma's head, every little thing about him is good.

-

The world _is_ ironic, Kenma thinks again, when they meet his mother in front of Kenma's house. A slight flush makes its way on Kenma's cheeks, his fingers lanced with Kuroo's, but his mother doesn't even flinch. There's only a knowing smile on her face that makes Kuroo grin when he says his goodbyes and turns back to go to his house. Kenma feels how his face gets warmer with every passing second and he wants to lower his head in embarrassment but his mother catches his glare.

"He's a strange boy," she says, smiling gently and Kenma realises he's smiling back. Because there's no need to explain anything to her and instead he makes a mental note to ask her later just how exactly she imagines Kuroo. But for now, he decides to settle with the simplest thing, turning his eyes to watch Kuroo's receding figure when he lets out a sigh and whispers,

"Yes, sometimes he is."


End file.
